Are you noticing the world changing around you, but not in a good way? Are you wondering how to continue showing up authentically and joyfully as society shifts away from what you value or find important?

This existential challenge is something many people grapple with in their daily lives. At its core, it’s about finding ways to navigate a world that sometimes seems to clash with our deepest beliefs, desires, and values. In this post, Evergreen Therapeutics explores how to engage with this tension thoughtfully and constructively, and how therapy can offer support in addressing these profound concerns.

 

 

1. Acknolwedging the Discomfort: What We’re Really Facing

 

The first step in confronting existential issues is acknowledging the discomfort you feel when your inner world doesn’t align with the outer one. This feeling often manifests as frustration, anxiety, or even a sense of alienation. Perhaps you value deep connection and authenticity, but find yourself surrounded by superficial interactions or a fast-paced, results-driven culture. Or, you may yearn for simplicity and mindfulness, yet feel pulled by the constant demands of modern life.

These feelings are valid and deserve to be explored with empathy and curiosity. Instead of dismissing them as weakness or “overthinking”, try to view them as signs that you are in touch with your deeper self, and that there is an opportunity for growth and self-discovery in the midst of discomfort.

It is also important to acknowledge that the feeling of dissonance between your values and the worlds isn’t always just a result of external circumstances; sometimes, it’s also about the gap between your ideal self and the person you currently are. This tension can be as much an internal struggle as an external one. Exploring both angles in therapy can help you get to the root of these feelings.

2. Re-Evaluating Your Values in a Changing World

In our increasingly complex world, it’s not uncommon for our values to be tested. What seemed like a clear sense of purpose may begin to feel unclear when you confront the realities of modern life. However, this doesn’t mean that your values are outdated or irrelevant; it simply suggests that they may need to be refined or reframed in ways that allow you to live more authentically.

Take some time to reflect on your core values. Ask yourself:

  • What do I stand for?
  • What principles guide my decisions and actions?
  • Are these values still relevant in the context of my current life?
  • How can I adapt them to address the challenges that I face today?

This process isn’t about changing your values entirely, but rather finding ways to live in alignment with them within the context of modern life. For example, if you value sustainability but feel overwhelmed by consumer culture, you could start by making small changes in your daily life, such as buying fewer disposable products or supporting companies with ethical practices. It’s not about perfection, but about making conscious, value-driven choices in a world that often feels out of sync with those ideals.

Therapists can help in this process of self-examination by offering tools and strategies that help make sense of inner conflict and provide guidance in aligning daily choices with your authentic self. This might involve redefining what success means to you or finding ways to incorporate more meaning into work, relationships, and self-care. Therapy can also help you cultivate a mindset of growth and adaptation as you move forward with your values.

3. Finding Meaning in a Disconnected World

 

Existential psychology emphasizes the importance of finding personal meaning, even in the face of overwhelming disconnection. According to Viktor Frankl, a key figure in existential therapy, we have the power to find purpose in suffering by choosing our response to life’s challenges.

When external circumstances don’t align with your values it is essential to focus on what you can control, which is YOUR perspective and YOUR actions. Frankl’s notion of “attitude towards suffering” suggests that, while we can’t always control our environment, we can choose how we relate to it. This might involve making small, intentional changes in your life to create a sense of meaning or focusing on your personal growth despite external pressures.

This idea of personal agency can be incredibly empowering. Even when you feel like the world around you doesn’t match your values, you can still create meaningful experiences. Whether that is through creative expression, meaningful relationships, or contributing to a cause you care about, you can still find ways to infuse your life with meaning.

Consider asking yourself questions like:

  • What parts of my life still align with my values, even if they are small?
  • How can I turn daily activities into opportunities for deeper meaning?
  • In what ways can I build a life that reflects my values, even when the world seems to be moving in a different direction?

These reflective questions help shift the focus from what’s wrong with the world to what you can control and change. This shift in focus can be a powerful step toward creating a more fulfilling life.

 

4. Building Resilience and Acceptance

 

It’s natural to feel some resistance when confronting a world that doesn’t align with your deepest beliefs. However, part of the existential process is learning how to live with ambiguity and uncertainty. The struggle to find meaning isn’t a sign of failure; it’s an essential part of the human experience.

Building resilience in the face of an unyielding world involves accepting that some level of discomfort may always be present. Rather than constantly fighting against the external forces that feel out of sync with you, try cultivating acceptance. This doesn’t mean resignation; rather, it’s about acknowledging that you can’t control everything and that your journey is about finding peace within the things you can’t change while still fighting for what matters most to you.

Therapists can help you develop resilience through mindfulness, cognitive reframing, and exploring existential themes like freedom, choice, and responsibility. Mindfulness practices can teach you to live in the present moment and accept the impermanence of life without judgment. Cognitive reframing can help you see challenges as opportunities for growth, rather than obstacles to happiness.

Developing a more flexible mindset about your values can also help. Some of the “rigid” ideals you might be holding on to might need to evolve as you encounter new experiences, and that flexibility can ease feelings of frustration or stagnation. Therapy can be a great resource to help you navigate this delicate balance between maintaining your authenticity and embracing change.

5. Seeking Community and Support

 

Finally, remember that you are not alone in these existential struggles. Finding a supportive community, whether through therapy, friends who share your values, or groups that align with your vision for the world, can offer significant support. When you connect with others who share your sense of purpose, it can help you feel less isolated and more empowered to navigate the tension between your core values and the external world.

This sense of community is especially important in a world that can feel individualistic and disconnected. There’s power in knowing that there are others out there who are grappling with similar issues. Whether it is joining a group that advocates for environmental sustainability or seeking out spiritual or creative communities that align with your values, these connections can help you feel grounded and inspired.

Therapy, too, can offer a valuable space to explore these feelings, helping you process the existential challenges you face in a compassionate and nonjudgemental environment. A therapist can also provide you with the tools to rebuild a sense of hope, purpose, and authenticity in a world that often feels disconnected from your inner truth.

Final Thoughts- Embracing the Journey:

 

Living in a world that feels vastly different from your core values is a difficult and often lonely experience, but it is also an opportunity for deep personal growth. By embracing the discomfort, re-evaluating your values, finding meaning in your choices, and building resilience, you can navigate this existential journey with greater clarity and a renewed sense of purpose.

If you’re struggling with the tension between your values and the world around you, reaching out to a therapist can provide you with the support, tools, and guidance to create a more meaningful and authentic life. Therapy can help you explore these deeper questions, offering insights and strategies that allow you to live more in alignment with yourself, regardless of the circumstances.

Take the first step toward clarity and peace today! 

Connect with a therapist on our team to schedule a FREE consultation and learn how therapy can help you navigate existential issues that seem out of your control. 

If you are interested in speaking with a professional and you reside in Ontario, Canada, please do not hesitate to contact us at admin@evergreentherapeutics.ca. We offer a team of psychotherapists who treat a variety of mental health concerns and work with individuals, couples, and families. Visit our website www.evergreentherapeutics.ca for more information.